First Impressions
by Chibito
Summary: Jack O’Neill and Samantha Carter recall their fateful meeting and ponder their forbidden love.


_**Genre:** Romance/Angst_

_**Rating:** K+ (for slight language)_

_**Pairings:** Jack O'Neill/Samantha Carter_

_**Summary:** Jack O'Neill and Samantha Carter recall their fateful meeting… And ponder on their forbidden love…_

_**Other:** A one shot. Complete._

**_Disclaimer: I do not own Stargate SG-1._ **

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First Impressions

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My first impression of him…?_**My first impression of her…**

_Fit._

**A woman!**

_Tall, well built… Hm, yeah, pretty attractive._

**A hot woman at that!**

_A little old for me, I told that to myself instantly._

**Young… yeah, young. But at the time, I… um… Sara…**

_But still, very fit! Then I realised he was going to be, well, already was, my CO._

**I don't think of Sara anymore though.**

_That's when I saw the rest of the men in the room._

**I don't think we took well to her at first…**

_I knew they were going to be absolute assholes._

**Fine, I admit, I didn't like her at all when I realised she was a scientist!**

_I was pretty defensive…_

**That's when I realised she had some spunk!**

_But even though he pissed me off, he had this… really charming smile._

**I like spunk.**

_One of the best words to describe that man. Charming._

**Noticed she looked good in her uniform…**

_I guess he stole my heart the moment I met him._

**Not that I was looking. The meeting was all I had on my mind!**

_Eyes that remind you of melted chocolate…_

**Her most defining feature? Her crystal blue eyes.**

Did I mention that charming smile of his? 

**And blonde… like Sara.**

_Even though he was really annoying in that meeting, I found myself liking him a lot._

**I realised she was clever immediately. Typical scientists…**

_He's attractive, not just in appearance, but in personality too._

**But then again, a pretty and nice scientist! You don't see many of them! (That good-for-nothing Felger is proof of that that!)**

_I think people generally like and trust him... I did, anyway._

**Inside of me, I was impressed with her. Female, part of the military and a damn clever scientist!**

_He has courage beyond that of any guy I've ever met._

**God yeah, she was different.**

_He would fight for what he believed in, even if that meant going against General Hammond's orders._

**She has a fantastic fighting spirit… I've never seen a woman so…**

_To be honest, on first glance, he looked so… strict, so serious._

**Amazing. Yeah, amazing. That's a good word.**

_Ironically, he's barely strict, and not particular serious. I enjoy his jokes… even if some of them are about me!_

**She's dedicated; it was obvious when I met her.**

_He would willingly sacrifice himself for anyone on our team._

**But she also has this emotional side of her… A side not many of us have seen because she hides it so well.**

_He's a just and fair man._

**Damnit, the military's rules really mess up lives.**

_I've lost count of how many times he's saved my life, and Teal'c's and Daniel's. Jonas, those people out there… Not to mention the world… worlds, even!_

**I hate it. I do.**

_What would this world be without him?_

**But I can't forget about the billions of lives out there.**

_Me? I think I'd die…_

**They depend on us… on me.**

_I hate having to serve under the man I love, knowing nothing can ever come out of it, but…_

**Not just this world, but those other planets out there, with tons and tons of people and animals and plants.**

_The world is more important than me._

**How do I really feel about her?**

_I…_

**I love her.**

_I love him._

**But I'd probably have to die first before I could actually do anything about it.**

_It's painful. But I'd rather have him by my side, living, than to lose him._

**There are times when I step into that Stargate, worrying like hell.**

_What if he dies out there again?_

**I can't stand to see her injured… especially not for me, under my command.**

_I don't think I could… survive. I've almost lost him too many times!_

**Will I ever do anything? Probably not.**

_It's forbidden._

**Untouched…**

_But I won't stop loving him…_

**Moving on isn't as easy as I thought it would be.**

_I tried to love someone else…_

**I didn't think she'd be this much trouble! I didn't realise I'd fall for someone this badly again...**

_God, almost ended up marrying the guy…_

**When I learned she was gonna get herself hitched to that… cop…**

_I shouldn't have done that to Pete. It was unfair of me._

**I was angry… very angry. And worried.**

_And to him too…_

**But I guess I can't talk. I was dating Kerry…**

_But he moved on too._

**I may have hurt her feelings without realising…**

_I hurt him._

**I don't wanna hurt her.**

_I don't ever want to do that again._

**She's precious to me.**

_I don't blame him… us… for not pursuing anything._

**More than anyone else in the world.**

_At least I know how he feels… and he knows my emotions too._

**Even though the world has to come before her.**

_I don't care as long as he stays with me… always._

**I made her a promise. That I would always be with her.**

_It keeps me going._

**And I will keep it.**

_Maybe we'll never know what would be like if we were… together._

**I would die for her.**

_But maybe…_

**I'm glad the President sees that.**

_We've done so much for the SGC._

**They've gotta make an exception.**

_Saved so many lives…_

**For crying out loud, they owe us it!**

_Almost died ourselves…_

**It's their fault for making us meet in the first place!**

_This would have never happened if the Stargate had never existed…_

**It was… fate.**

_That day, in the meeting room…_

**Yeah… fate put us together.**

_I don't regret ever meeting him though._

**Thank god for fate.**

_When he announced he was leaving for Washington…_

**I miss her.**

_I knew I was going to hurt a little… fine, a lot._

**I want to see her more… like we used to.**

_I missed him… I still do._

**Thank heavens for the telephone and email!**

_I treasure every moment with him._

**All those memories we share…**

_I remember in Antarctica… How I had to sleep on him to keep him warm… Almost lost him._

**Edora… she fought so hard for me… Never gave up.**

_All those alternate realities, they point to what should be…_

**I owe her so much.**

_I want him so much._

**From that fateful day…**

_That we met…_

**My first impressions of her weren't wrong.**

_He was almost the way I thought he would be._

**A beautiful woman.**

_An amazing man._

_**That was my first impression.**_

**- END -**

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Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it and please review!_

_Chibito_


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